Where Art Thou Dreams
Dreaming comes easily for some, and not so much for others. But no matter how naturally it comes to you, after a few years just trying to get by in an unfulfilling job, or becoming a new mama, or enduring a major life change, you can feel totally abandoned, or confused by your dreams.
There are times in our lives where it may genuinely be necessary to put our dreams on hold. But if we let it go on for too long it can take it’s toll on our ability to reconnect. As a mum of two, and an avid dreamer, I really fought hard to hang on to my dreams. I had a business that was bringing in some extra money, but I really wanted it to grow. Instead of focusing on my deep, foundational dreams, I just got stuck on the hamster wheel. I had a few identity crises along the way. Motherhood turned out to be different to what I expected, and had me questioning the core of who I was.
I lost my dreams, but rather than really doing some work on myself first, I just hung onto what was in front of me, my business. And that inevitably became my substitute dream.
I lost my dreams, but rather than really doing some work on myself first, I just hung onto what was in front of me, my business. And that inevitably became my substitute dream. I encased myself in this second rate dream of growing the business I had, and personal growth was not a priority. At the time I just thought I was ‘pushing through’ or ‘fighting’ for my dream. But I was fighting myself. I was home trying to be a good mum to two little bundles of energy, and trying to grow a business, and I just didn’t see how I could find time in that mix for self improvement. In fact, I didn’t really give myself time to even think about it. I wasn’t even giving my true dreams a chance to show themselves.
I am stubborn. So stubborn. People were trying to tell me that maybe I needed to take a break from the business, and reevaluate. But I wouldn’t have it. I’d spent too long, put too much blood, sweat and tears into it, to put it all on hold, and loose that momentum. One thing I did know, was that it wasn’t going anywhere the way things were. I’d reached my plateau. I was just running around in circles, tired from doing what I felt I had to, but not moving forward. So I ‘reevaluated’, but only on a superficial level. I still didn’t take the time to look deeper, and remind myself who I was. After this evaluation I changed directions slightly, but ended up with the same problems. And then I did it again, and the same issues reemerged. Because I was missing the most important part. Looking at myself.
2016 was such a ginormous blessing! I was able to separate work from home life, and was able to put some time into remembering who I was aside from all the business aspirations, and the mum title. Both things I love, but needed to be able to seperate my identity from. I feel so much more hopeful and fulfilled, and although life is still a journey, and things don’t always go to plan, being ok with who you are makes it so much easier to trust the process and keep a positive attitude.
I think the single most important step in discovering your dreams, is to keep personal growth a priority. Discovering or rediscovering your dreams is a process, and it doesn’t end just because you’re on the right path. So always continue to look inwards and work out how you can grow and I think the dreams will naturally follow.
If you are struggling to connect with your dreams, or you’re unsure if the dream your chasing is really your foundational dream, then the answer, as lame-o as it sounds, is to ‘look inside first’. Who are you? That is where you should start. Forgetting all pretence, all circumstances, all history. Who are you? What areas do you need to work on? What are your strengths? What is holding you back?
My challenge for you is to consider if you’re on a the right path for you? When was the last time you took some time away from the craziness of day-to-day life to evaluate your personal growth? Are you so invested in your current path that you’re missing the better path, the one that is actually for you? Feel free to comment below, or send a message. I would love to hear where you’re at. 🙂